The Courage to Connect
Humanity arises when we open our hearts to one another. True leadership builds bridges, not walls.
Adam Danyal & Julia Danyal
October 23, 2023
WRITTEN BY: ADAM DANYAL
We pay lip service to diversity, but true inclusion remains elusive. Organizations adopt policies and data metrics, yet something vital is missing. Despite best intentions, teams divide into cliques. Conversations happen in silos. Decisions reflect singular thinking.
The obstacle isn’t solely overt bias or discrimination. It’s an invisible wall we build between one another. Call it guardedness – a subtle distrust of those who differ from us. We keep others at arm’s length to protect our status and ideas. But arm’s length is a dangerous distance. Connection requires proximity.
Great leaders know trust is built through vulnerability. They model openness by sharing their own stories. Where did you grow up? What challenges have shaped you? What dreams drive you? Simple questions that reveal our shared humanity.
When leaders open up, teams follow their lead. Walls between colleagues begin to crumble. But some still hesitate to drop their guard. Old habits of self-protection die hard.
That’s when courageous leaders take the next step: They go first and get personal. They disclose an embarrassing moment or a painful failure. They confess an unpopular opinion or a secret fear. Now the invitation to connect feels real. Barriers melt away as teammates bond through mutual understanding.
Inclusion flourishes when we embrace each other’s full selves. But many of us cling to caricatures, seeing colleagues as warriors or worriers, artists or accountants. Don’t settle for cardboard cutouts. Draw out real people with hopes and heartaches. Life stories are a gateway into the soul.
Discover each other’s passions. Learn someone’s personal hero. Ask about favorite books and bands. Small talk opens big doors.
With less to shield, we grow more bold. Fresh thinking emerges from diverse voices. New angles illuminate complex problems when unique perspectives collide. But collision requires proximity. Don’t fear the friction that forces breakthroughs.
Inclusion is a contact sport. Huddle up. Get uncomfortable. Genuine bonds build resilience to weather trials as one. What will it take to become that kind of team? The power lies in your hands. Reach out across the divide. Drop your guard, and watch trust take hold.
From our Leadership Bookshelf:
WRITTEN BY: JULIA DANYAL
Inclusion remains an elusive goal for many organizations. Despite good intentions, invisible barriers persist between colleagues. True connection requires vulnerability – a willingness to share and understand our differences. In her book "The Culture Map," Erin Meyer gives us these key takeaways:
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1. Understand how culture shapes communication styles. Direct feedback that's valued in some cultures may be seen as rude in others. Adapting your approach promotes trust and understanding.
2. Bridge cross-cultural gaps through empathy. Don't judge behaviors as good or bad. Seek to understand cultural norms behind them. Curiosity expands your perspectives.
3. Find common ground through shared values. Focus on your aligned goals and desires to connect. Shared hopes and dreams unite us across divisions.
The path to inclusion runs through courageous conversations. Letting down our guard takes work but yields great reward. When we open our minds to understand each other's cultures and stories, walls between us collapse. United in our humanity, we can achieve extraordinary things.